Managing

I have always hated the term Control, as in "Is your diabetes under control?" 

First of all, it is a rude question. you do not ask someone if their cancer is under control, you just ask how they are. 

Secondly, it implies a straight line. Often the question even comes with a hand gesture, running one's hand in a straight line to further imply that my blood sugar should be steady and constant as a rock. 

Well here is some news; no one's blood sugar runs in a perfectly straight line. Not even non-diabetics. And my blood sugar is not 'under control'. Diabetes is akin to a wild animal; imagine letting a monkey loose in your house, you would not be trying to 'control' it, to teach it to behave, you would be minimizing the damage. You would react to what the monkey was doing as fast as you could, but it would still make a mess, it would be running the show. 

Personally I prefer the term managed; as in I am doing what I am supposed to, and when the monkey starts flinging poop it is not my fault. 

The truth is, I am not managing my diabetes either. When I started college life got very busy, and for the first time in four years I was not surrounded by people who knew I had diabetes. I was not embarrassed by my diabetes, but I started to notice how incredibly inconvenient diabetes was. 

Well this is going to be the start of a new leaf for me. I am starting over, and I am going to share that journey with you because I think it is important for people to know they are not alone, to know that they can get support, and to stop playing the blame game when it comes to diabetes and just blame the monkey.