Friday, September 21, 2012

Stress

Stress is a pain in the butt, but adding diabetes into the equation of life makes it just a little bit harder (or a lot harder) So when two weeks ago I had foot surgery to have a benign soft tissue mass removed (Gross=O) it put my body under some stress... then when a week later when we found out that it should have closed up... but didn't, it put my mind under some stress=( Then when they called and told my mama that I had a staff infection in the wound.... yeah I was pretty freaked out=(

Now I have a cold... and last night (into this morning) I've had two bad sets in a row (One that actually alarmed at me... which like never happens)

So in the past two weeks, I've had almost constant highs... (yeah that's great for the stupid foots healing process) and have gotten up a minimum of four times every night chasing dexcom alarms.....

I'm tired... and stressed... and sick... and worried.....

But I'm not stopping, as diabetics giving up isn't an option... and while that makes us very strong people, it also makes us sad some times, and frustrated, and tired, and angry. I can't tell you how to fix it... I don't have the recipe for emotional success... just a three step process that keeps my head from falling off.

#1. Put in head phones with really great songs (Ingrid Michelson... Jack Johnson... Needtobreathe)

#2. Block out the world (How every I can... shopping at target... writing... what ever works)

#3. Pour my heart out to God.... because when you get to that place where you're to tired to breathe, and you feel like you can't go on, their arn't words to describe how you feel, how much you hurt, and what you want. But God can read my heart, I can close my eyes and just curl up next to Him in a strong tower...

Sure, when I open my eyes, my bg may still be high, and I'll still be tired and sick... but I won't be alone, I'll have a friend by my side who knows how I'm feeling even when I don't.

No comments: